Once upon a time there was a fisherman who lived with his
wife in a piss pot near the sea. Every day the fisherman went out to fish, and
all he did was fish and fish. One day he was sitting with his line and gazing
into the clear water. And all he did was sit and sit. Suddenly his line sank
deep down to the bottom, and when he pulled it up, he had a large flounder on
the line, and the flounder said to him, "Listen here, fisherman, I beg of
you, let me live. I'm not a real flounder but an enchanted prince. So what good
would it do you to kill me? I certainly wouldn't taste very good. Put me back
into the water, and let me go."
"Hold on," said the man. "You don't have to
waste your words on me. I would have thrown a talking fish back into the water
anyway."
He then put the fish back into the clear water, and the
flounder swam to the bottom, leaving behind a long streak of blood. Then the
fisherman stood up and returned to the piss pot to be with his wife and told
her that he had caught a flounder but since it had been an enchanted prince, he
had let him go.
"Didn't
you wish for anything?" asked the wife.
"No,"
said the husband. "What should I have wished for?"
"Ah," said the wife. "Don't you think it's
awful that we've got to live in this piss pot? It stinks, and it's disgusting.
You should have wished for a little hut. Go back and call him. Tell him we want
a little hut. I'm sure he'll give us one."
The
husband didn't think that this was the right thing to do, but he went back to
the sea anyway, and when he arrived, the sea was green and yellow, and he stood
on the shore and said:
"Flounder, flounder, in the sea,
if you're a man, then speak to me.
Though I don't agree with my wife's
request,
I've
come to ask it nonetheless."
The flounder came swimming up to him and
said, "Well, what does she want?"
"Oh," said the man, "my wife, Isabel, thinks
I should have wished for something because I caught you. Since she doesn't want
to live in a piss pot, she'd like to have a hut."
"Just go home," said the
flounder. "She's already got it."
The fisherman went home, and his wife was standing in the
doorway of a hut and said to him: "Come inside, husband. Look! Now, isn't
this much better?"
There was a stove and a parlor, also a kitchen. Behind the
hut was a little yard and garden with all kinds of vegetables and chickens and
ducks.
"Oh,"
said the fisherman, "now we can enjoy ourselves."
"Yes," said the wife,
"we're going to enjoy it."
Everything went well for about a week or two, and then the
wife said, "Listen, husband, the hut is much too cramped, and the yard and
garden are too little. I want a large stone castle. Go back to the flounder and
tell him to give us a castle."
"Ah, wife," said the husband. "The flounder
has just given us a hut, and I don't want to go back again so soon. The
flounder might be unwilling to do anything."
"What do you mean?" said the wife. "He can
easily do it, and he'll be glad to do it. Just go back to him!"
So
the fisherman left, and his heart grew heavy. When he got to the sea, the water
was purple, dark blue, gray, and dense but still calm. Then he stood there and
said:
"Flounder, flounder, in the sea,
if you're a man, then speak to me.
Though I don't agree with my wife's
request,
I've
come to ask it nonetheless."
"What
now! What does she want?" the flounder asked.
"Oh," said the fisherman,
somewhat distressed. "My wife wants to live in a large
stone castle."
"Go home. She's standing in front
of the door," the flounder said.
The fisherman went home, and his wife
was standing in front of a large palace.
"So, husband," she said,
"isn't this beautiful?"
He went inside with her, and there were many servants, and
the walls were all bright. The chairs and tables were made of gold. Behind the
palace was a huge yard and a park half a mile long with deer and does and
rabbits. There was also a stable for cows and horses.
"Oh," said the husband,
"now let's live in the beautiful castle and be content."
"We'll have to think about
that," said the wife, "and sleep on it."
Then they went to bed.
The next morning the wife woke up. It was just daybreak,
and he poked her husband in his side with her elbow and said, "Husband,
get up. We must be king and rule this entire country."
"Ah,
wife!" said the husband. "Why should we be king? I don't want to be
king."
"Well," said the wife,
"then I'll be king."
"Oh, wife," said the husband, "where can you
be king? The flounder won't want to make you king."
"Husband,"
said the wife, "go straight to him and tell him I must be king!"
The fisherman went but was very
distressed that his wife wanted to be king.
When
he got to the sea, it was completely gray and black, and the water was
fermenting from below. The fisherman stood there and said:
"Flounder, flounder, in the sea,
if you're a man, then speak to me.
Though I don't agree with my wife's
request,
I've
come to ask it nonetheless."
"Well,
what does she want?" asked the flounder.
"Oh,"
said the man, "she wants to be king."
"Go back home," said the
flounder. "She's already king."
Then the man went home, and as he approached the palace, he
saw that there were many soldiers, drums, and trumpets. His wife was sitting on
a high throne of gold and diamonds, and she wore a large golden crown. Two rows
of ladies-in-waiting were standing on either side of her, each lady a head
shorter than the next.
"Oh,"
said the fisherman, "now you're king, aren't you?"
"Yes," said his wife, "I
am king."
After he gazed at her for some time, he said, "Oh,
wife, it's wonderful that you're king! Now let's not wish for anything
more."
"No, husband," the wife said as she became very
restless. "I have too much time on my hands, and I can't stand it anymore.
I'm king, but now I also want to be emperor."
"Oh,
wife," said the fisherman, "why do you want to be emperor?"
"Husband," she said, "go
to the flounder. I want to be emperor!'
"Oh, wife," the husband said. "He can't make
you emperor. I don't want to tell that to the flounder."
"I'm king," she said, "and
you're just my husband. Go there at once!"
The
fisherman went away, but as he was walking, he thought, "This won't turn
out well at all. It's outrageous for her to be emperor. The flounder's going to
become sick and tired of this in the end." When he got to the sea, it was
all black and dense, and a strong wind whipped across the surface and made the
water curdle. Then the fisherman stepped forward and said:
"Flounder, flounder, in the sea,
if you're a man, then speak to me.
Though I don't agree with my wife's
request,
I've
come to ask it nonetheless."
"Well,
what does she want?" asked the flounder.
"Oh,
flounder," he said. "My wife wants to be emperor."
"Go back home," said the
flounder. "She's already emperor."
Then the man went home, and when he arrived, he saw his
wife sitting on a very high throne made from a single piece of gold. She was
wearing a large crown three yards tall and covered with diamonds and garnets.
She was flanked on either side by two rows of bodyguards, each man shorter than
the next, beginning with a tremendous giant two miles tall and ending with the
tiniest dwarf, who was no bigger than my pinky. There were also many princes
and dukes standing before her, and her husband stepped up and said, "Wife,
now you're emperor, aren't you?"
"Yes," she said, "I'm
emperor."
"Oh," said the fisherman, and he gazed at her for
some time, "it's wonderful that you're emperor."
"Husband," she replied. "why are you
standing there like that? I'm emperor, but now I also want to be pope."
"Oh,
wife," said the husband. "Why do you want to be pope?"
"Husband,"
she said. "I want to be pope!"
"No, wife," said the fisherman. "The
flounder can't make you pope. It won't turn out well."
"Stop talking nonsense, husband!" said the wife.
"If he can make me emperor, he can also make me pope. Go there at
once!"
So the fisherman went off, but he felt rather queasy. He
was trembling, and his knees began to wobble. A strong wind swept across the
land. The water rose up in waves, and the waves splashed against the shore.
Ships were in distress as they were tossed up and down by the waves. Though
there was still a little blue in the middle of the sky, the horizon was
completely red, as if a heavy thunderstorm were coming. Then he stepped forward
and said:
"Flounder, flounder, in the sea
if you're a man, then speak to me.
Though I don't agree with my wife's
request,
I've
come to ask it nonetheless."
"Well,
what does she want?" asked the flounder.
"Oh,"
the man said, "she wants to be pope."
"Go back home," said the
flounder. "She's already pope."
Then the man went home, and when he arrived, his wife was
sitting on a throne two miles high and was wearing three large golden crowns on
her head. Numerous bishops and priests were standing around her, and there were
two rows of candles on either side of her. The biggest candle was as thick and
as large as the highest tower, and the tiniest was a church candle.
"Wife,"
the man said as he took a good look at her, "are you the pope?"
"Yes," she said, "I'm
pope."
"Oh, wife," he said, "Isn't it wonderful
that you're pope. You must be satisfied. Now that you're pope, you can't become
anything greater."
"I'll think about it," said
the wife.
Then they both went to bed, but she wasn't satisfied, and
her ambition prevented her from sleeping. She kept thinking of ways she might
become greater than she was. When the sun began to rise, she sat at the window
and thought, "Aha, I could also make the sun rise!" Then she became
quite grim and poked her husband and said, "Husband, go to the flounder. I
want to be like God."
The husband was still half asleep, but he was so shocked by
what she had said that he fell out of the bed.
"Ah, wife," he said. "Be
content and remain pope."
"Ahh, wife!" the husband said. "The flounder
can't do that. He can make you emperor and pope, but he can't make you
God."
"Husband," she said and looked ghastly, "I
want to be like God. I want you to go to the flounder at once!"
Now
his limbs began to tremble, and he was filled with fear. Outside a great storm
was raging so much that all the trees and mountains were shaking. The sky was
pitch black, and there was thunder and lightning. Black waves rose up in the
sea as high as mountains, and they all had crests of white foam on top. Then
the fisherman said:
"Flounder, flounder, in the sea,
if you're a man, then speak to me.
Though I don't agree with my wife's
request,
I've
come to ask it nonetheless."
"Well, what does she want?" the flounder asked.
"Oh," he said, "she wants to be like God."
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